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They just happen to be looking for someone. But first, the Bush Foreman takes him for a ride into the bush in the company pickup truck to see how much he knows. The foreman stops the truck on the side of the road and points at a tree.‘See that tree over there? I want you to tell me what species it is and how many board feet of lumber it contains.’The Newfie promptly answers, ‘Dat dere’s a Sitka Spruce and she got 383 board feet a’ lumber in ‘ER.’The foreman is impressed. He puts the truck in motion and stops again about a mile down the road. He points at another tree through the passenger door window and asks the same question. This time, it’s a bigger tree and of a different class.‘Lord tunderin’! Dat’s yer Douglas Fir and she got 690 board feet.’ says the Newfie. Now the foreman is really impressed. The Newfie has answered quickly and got the answers right without even using a calculator!One more test. They drive a little farther down the road, and the foreman stops again. This. "God damn it Bill, what the fuck is wrong with you? Don't you want me any more? Do I turn you off so much that you can't even give me a hug? Christ honey we haven't been intimate since before I got pregnant and that was fourteen damned months ago!" He tried to hush me up but I was too mad and too drunk and I wouldn't quit, "Don't you try to hush me up Bill Jackson, if you want me to quit yelling then take me to the bedroom and make love to me the way you used to!" Eventually my son broke up the argument by putting his arm around my shoulder and leading out of the backyard and into the kitchen.Brian hugged me then sat me down in a kitchen chair. "Mom you have to calm down!"I was sitting there with tears streaming down my cheeks when Brian knelt down beside me and put his hand on my shoulders and leaned in and kissed my cheek. I smiled at his peace making gesture. "Oh I'm sorry honey but I just can't stand your father's lack of affection one second longer." I looked up and saw that.
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